Click here for printable version. The Effects on Children   1. Often women will start to see the effects violence has on their children and this will give them the courage they need to leave the batterer. 2. In homes where domestic violence occurs, children are abused at a rate of 1,500% higher than the national average. 3. Children tend to be deprived and neglected of vital attention because the mother is under such severe stress and sapped of energy to nurture her children. The mother's low self-esteem is passed on to her children. 4. Growing up in a family where the father abuses the mother instills strongly in both male and female children the idea that venting aggression against women is normal and socially acceptable. 5. The children who are not directly abused are the victims of emotional effects, including constant anxiety, fear of abandonment and guilt from not being able to stop the abuse or for loving the abuser. They are often the only witnesses to the violence and the experience can be terrifying and confusing. The anger they experience is often times suppressed and turned into a deep sense of shame that can cause problems in their future relationships. Fact: 1/3 of the children who witness the battering of their mothers demonstrate significant behavioral and/or emotional problems. 6. Some children attempt to intervene to stop the violence. Some may align themselves to the mother to protect her; others identify with the fathers and are also abusive towards their mother. Still, others are intimidated into silence and passivity. Most children will feel responsible for the abuse. 7. Children learn how to be abusers from growing up in violent homes. Therefore, domestic violence today is a precursor of future domestic violence. Fact: Boys who witness domestic violence are more likely to batter their female partners as adults than boys raised in non-violent homes. 8. There is increased evidence that children who grow up in violent families are unusually prone to all forms of violence in adulthood: child abuse, rape, murder, as well as wife beating. Certainly lasting emotional trauma or an uncomprehending sense of guilt and futility affects each child. 9. Other consequences: Truancy; run-aways; substance abuse; violence toward siblings, peers, animals, and parents; and aggressiveness and role reversal with parents. Fact: Of all boys who commit homicide, almost 2/3 murder the men who were beating their mothers. 10. Stages of development are often skipped or stunted. Girls are often placed in the role of the mother when mother is unable to cope with the abuse as well as being a parent. The same is true for boys as they are placed in the role of the father with the mother becoming increasingly dependent on the son for meeting some of the needs that the father is failing to meet. 11. Teenagers often escape into early relationships, early pregnancies, early marriages. Effects of domestic violence on children Battering can disrupt children's eating and sleeping patterns, and make them suffer from inadequate rest and nutrition. The stress of domestic violence may cause children to revert to behaviors such as thumb-sucking, nail-biting, and bedwetting. Children whose mothers are abused are denied the kind of home life that fosters healthy development. These children more frequently have stress-related physical ailments, like headaches, ulcers, and rashes. Children from violent homes often experience depression, anxiety, fear, and guilt. These children live in constant fear of injury to their mothers and themselves. They may feel guilty about loving or hating the abuser, blame themselves for causing the violence, or feel utterly helpless about being able to stop the violence. Domestic violence may prevent children from concentrating on or doing homework. These children frequently have problems performing in school and may be held back. Children from violent homes may be overly aggressive and difficult to control. Or, they may be unusually passive and withdrawn. Men who batter often keep their partners and children from having contact with other family and friends. Lack of interaction with others outside the home makes it difficult for these children to get along with peers and adults. Frequent changes in residence are not uncommon among these families and can be very traumatic for children. In families where woman battering occurs, the rate of child abuse or serious neglect is 1500% higher than the national average. Research indicates that woman abuse in a family may be the single most important risk factor for child maltreatment. When mothers are battered, the father is about three times more likely to be the children's abuser than in families where woman battering does not occur. Older children may be harmed while trying to protect their mothers. Children in homes where domestic violence occurs may "indirectly" receive injuries. They may be hurt when household items are thrown or weapons are used. Infants may be injured if being held by their mother when the abuser strikes out. Men who batter often use the children to control the behavior of their female partners. For example, an abuser may threaten to harm the children to stop his partner from leaving him. Although children may not observe the violence, they almost always are aware that it is occurring. Even babies are known to be affected by domestic violence. Click here for printable version.